At least it's not glue.

I don't like bugs. In particular, I don't like bugs that can bite me. I am scared of them, the creepy crawlies. When Random and I first got married, he would come home to find cups upside down in various places throughout the house - usually with a spider, cricket, or another shameless intruder underneath. Lately, wasps are target and my efforts are becoming more and more violent. Like last summer for instance, a band of hornets set their sights on my garden. Or rather, the rail road ties around my garden. They bit my daughter and basically caused a nuisance. War began. Hubby went to the store and bought various products that seemed to slow them down, but not eradicate the beasts. Weeellll, I had a few to many daiquiris one Friday night (one to be exact) and I decided that the only way was to burn the little shits out of my garden. Burn them I did! As a ten foot flame rose into the heavens and I stood by smugly, he ran for the garden hose screaming "It's too close to the house!" JEEZZ babe, I said, calm down. He practically yells that it gonna burn the house down and what the hell was I thinking!? The wasps never returned...until this summer. Quite a few times one has managed to fly into the house and terrorize me and my magazines. Hubby went and got more useless spray for the patio and keeps it right beside the door (in the garage) in case of a wasp in the house emergency. Last week, a really BIG one got in the house. I was alone. Just me and the intruder. I open the garage door only to find GASP - NO WASP SPRAY! OMG what am I going to do? As panic rises into my throat and threatens to violently spew out of me I spot a can. Spray adhesive, well hell, THIS will kill the little bastard! OH YEAH, instantly he fell and relief flooded through me. Only one problem, the kitchen window suffered a little "spray adhesive" residue and I can't get it off. My amused hubby can't get it off either. So tonight, when I spray the spider in the bathroom with apple scented detangler and begged him to come remove the body his only statement was "At least it's not glue."